A Day in the Life of Us (Again)

 I recently read through some past blog posts when I came across this one. I enjoyed reading through what a day in our life looked like last July. It's amazing how different it looks 7 months later (with the addition of another kiddo). I'm glad I record these snippets of our life on this blog because I had forgotten so much of what life was like. The days are long, but the time is short! 

I secretly feel really justified when Michael tells me he doesn't know how I do this all day after he's spent some time with the kids by himself. Whether you are a working mom or a stay at home mom, they are both difficult for many reasons. But neither one is a walk in the park. I will never forget the time someone asked me how it was going as a new mom. After responding with "I'm exhausted!", she said "well, at least you don't have to work". But anyone who stays home with kids knows it is work. I have to intentionally override the need to say "I'm just a stay at home mom". Because it is not just anything. It's hard work. But blessed and good work too. And I wouldn't trade it for anything. 

If the classroom taught me anything, it's that children thrive on routine. I do too. We don't have a set schedule, but more of a rhythm for our day. Each day looks slightly different, but this is the overall gist of our day.

Here is what a day in the life of us looks like in February 2021:

• 4:30-6:00 Ewan fights sleep: I wish we didn't have to start our day this way, but we usually start by putting the paci in again and again, nursing, or co-sleeping just to get a few extra minutes of good sleep. 
• 6:00/7:00 Wake up: We have an all-hands-on-deck approach at our house. Michael conquers one kid and I do the other. He lets the dog out and feeds her then takes care of Isla. He helps get her dressed and get breakfast started. Meanwhile, I am changing Ewan, nursing him, and quickly trying to get ready myself. Michael makes his coffee, showers, and heads to "work" (aka our basement). Then I make myself breakfast and coffee while Isla is finishing hers up. Her breakfast is usually a smoothie or yogurt filled with all her supplements and eggs or a Lara bar. She's a hearty eater in the morning. 
• 7:00-8:00/30 Playtime: Isla attempts to play independently (although sometimes it's me setting a sensory bin up or reading a book with one hand while I'm cleaning up breakfast with the other hand). Ewan gets some floor time. I also fill up all the diffusers for the day and start blasting John Mayer. And then I usually get a text from Michael ("John Mayer again?" hahaha). 

• 8:00/30 Ewan's first nap begins and morning basket: We follow wake windows for Ewan, which means his naps are based off of how much awake time he has had. If he gets up at 6:00, his first nap is around 8:00. If he sleeps in, then his first nap is much later. It's a little annoying to not have a set nap schedule, but wake windows allow me to put him down awake in his crib and he falls asleep on his own. It's kind of amazing. So after a diaper change and nursing session #2, he lays down. Then Isla and I begin our morning basket, after a quick coffee reheat in the microwave.

         Her morning basket is just a time where we connect. She really enjoys it and I enjoy the one-on-one             time. I think it has helped her adjust to having a brother by getting that special time with me. If she is             really engrossed in play, however, we skip morning basket. Our time consists of dressing the weather             bear for the day, reading a devotion, reciting a Bible verse, and then working on our unit. We are                 finishing up the unit on her body. We usually have a song, a poem, a story, and an activity related to             the topic. 

• 9:00-9:30ish Creative Time: After morning basket, Isla sometimes has an extension activity of our topic. Otherwise, she uses her own creativity here. She either paints, works with playdoh, uses a sensory bin, works on a new activity, or chooses to independently play again. She has independent access to all the art supplies. Meanwhile, I knock out a load of diaper laundry folding. 

 

The laundry is never ending in this house.

• 9:30 Snack: Isla helps me make snack usually. I also used this time on this particular day to prep our sourdough pizza dough and sourdough bread for a friend. Isla is really helpful in the kitchen and loves to bake and mix bread with me. We make bread every few days. 

• 9:30-10:00ish Play and Chores: I use this time to get some chores done, especially since Ewan is still sleeping on this particular day. It would be much easier to do chores during Isla's naptime, but I think it's important for my kids to see what it takes to run a house. And I always ask Isla if she'd like to participate. Sometimes she does and sometimes she's busy. Eventually, it will be a time where the family does chores together. Isla does like to clean toilets though!

          *If we have special plans for the day, we try to squeeze it in here. Usually between Ewan's first and              second nap. Special plans that are Covid-safe are few and far between, especially in the cold weather.           But they include things like a trip to the nature preserve, the zoo, Nana's house, our Covid-bubble                  friend's house, or a park*

We are ever so slowly working towards being a zero-waste family. We've transitioned to cloth napkins and cloth paper towels, which is amazing for our planet and the future of my children and grandchildren, but boy does it require a lot of laundry. 

• 9:45-10:00  Ewan wakes up: Ewan finally woke up (really happy!) so that means diaper changes for both kids, nursing session #3, and Isla destroys the room (at least she offered to clean up when she was finished). 

I snapped this picture while we finished up nursing. Isla was telling me about the time she was scared at the zoo. It's important for toddlers to share the same story over and over again in order for them to process it. The situation she was talking about had a big impact on her because I don't think she's ever been scared of something before. We talked it through for the 100th time. She then moved on to a story about a friend that took a toy from her. We processed through that too. She ended with "we don't take toys from friends. We can ask for a turn and wait, right mom?". One of the reasons I love staying home is because I'm the one that gets moments like these. I'm the one that gets to process through her brain with her. I sure love it. 

Ewan practiced his sitting skills while sis got her diaper changed (Yes, she is still in diapers. No end in sight at this point...)

• 10:00-11:00 Outdoor time: Ideally, we would get outside much sooner than this, but with Ewan's naps and the time it takes to get everyone dressed, this is the most realistic time for us to get outside. In the summer, I'm hoping to send Isla out the back door without me while Ewan sleeps. Currently, it takes us anywhere from 5 minutes to 20 minutes for everyone to get dressed, throw out some really big emotions about getting dressed (i.e. tantrums), and finally get out the door. But I find outdoor time to be far more important than skipping altogether. I can't wait until its warm enough to not throw 50 layers on everyone. 

• 11:00 Lunch prep and Ewan's lunch: This particular day happened to be warm enough that Isla wanted to stay outside while I prepped lunch and fed Ewan. It was glorious because most days its a mad rush to get everyone inside and start feeding all the hungry people. Ewan eats sometime between his first and second nap and again at dinnertime. 

Isla stayed outside while Ewan ate, but needed to check that I wasn't feeding him something she might want a nibble of too :)

• 11:15/30 Lunch: Ewan is fighting a yeast infection and needs some naked time. So he hung out on the floor, Isla dressed in her Halloween costume (because, why not?), and I finished getting lunch ready. Then Isla eats her lunch while she listens to her favorite storytime podcast. I changed Ewan into a new outfit (he feeds himself and it can get rather messy), started nursing session #4, scarfed a few bites of my own lunch in between all of this, and did my best to clean as I went. 

• 11:45-12:00 Cleanup and Naps: I jokingly say the greatest lesson I've ever learned from Michael was that cleaning up your dishes as you go makes life a whole lot better. So I try to clean up as we go. Meanwhile, Ewan has reached the point of his wake window where he doesn't want to be set down by himself. So I carry him around while I impressively do dishes one-handed :)

         Isla finishes up her lunch and cleans herself up the best she can (something we are working on) while I          change Ewan's diaper again and put him down for his second nap. Sometimes this nap happens a little          sooner or after Isla's nap starts. It just depends on the day. 

• 12:00-3:00 Isla naps and Ewan naps until 1:00ish: After a diaper change, story, and song (the same routine we've had for 2 years), Isla takes her nap. Ewan usually finishes his nap around 1:00. So in the meantime, I get an hour or so of time to myself. I call this my union break and I do my best to refuel myself, rather than do chores. If I reset in the middle of the day, I'm a much better mom. Some days Ewan is up early from nap and I don't get any time. Those are the days my patience wears thin and my brain is fried. I do yoga, take a quick nap, read a book, update the blog, or something along those lines. Today I did yoga.

• 1:00-2:30/3:00 Ewan and Mama time: Ewan usually wakes up around 1:00 and we spend some time working on new skills, playing together, or he watches me as I do some more housework/dinner prep/whatever needs to be done. But first, nursing session #5 and I make the tough decision to forgo the fresh pot of coffee I want to make because I haven't had enough water today. I think one of the worst parts about getting older is making decisions about food and drinks. I know if I want coffee, it has to be now because any later and I won't be able to go to sleep tonight. But I also know at this point I haven't had enough ounces of water, so I will dehydrate myself and have to play catch-up. And this all revolves around the future-decision of whether or not I can have wine tonight. Because it is preposterous to have a second cup of coffee AND wine in the same day. I'd have to have a gallon of water at this point. Oh the joys of growing older... 

         (Also, I wouldn't be that concerned if I wasn't breastfeeding, but breastfeeding requires a lot of water).

• 2:30/3:00-3:30 Isla wakes and Daddy "comes home": Isla takes 2-3 hours of nap every day and Michael comes upstairs about 3:00. They always get the mail together. I usually finish up chores or deal with a fussy baby, since he's nearing his last nap. Of course, more laundry. 

• 3:30-5:00: Play, dinner prep, Ewan's last nap: Isla gets another diaper change and then starts playing with daddy usually. Sometimes they go outside or downstairs. Ewan has nursing session #6, a diaper change, and we try to get in a good last nap. This is his hardest nap. Sometimes I have to hold him, sometimes we try to have it happen in the car or stroller, and sometimes he does great in his crib. If I'm not holding him, I usually start prepping dinner. 

         On this particular day, we took a family walk together. We like to do this a lot when it's nice out! We             delivered our homemade bread to our friend and stopped by the park. I can't wait for summer when             we'll take a lot more walks like this! 

Usually, on pizza night, I have an enthusiastic helper who does more sauce and cheese eating than actual helping. But on this particular day, Ewan woke up on his stroller nap, so I took him home to nurse while Isla stayed at the park with Daddy. I made pizza one handed while I held my very clingy baby :)

• 5:00/5:30 Dinner: We make it a priority to have family dinner together every night, including Ewan. We always share our highs and lows of the day and things we saw or did. We always light a candle because it makes dinner a special time together. Tonight we had sourdough pizza, a family favorite!

                                     step 1:                                                                          step 2:

step 3: yum!

This is family dinner a few weeks ago.

• 5:30-6:45 Clean up and phone calls: After cleaning up dinner, we always call the grandparents and sometimes other family members. I'm so thankful for technology, especially when my family lives so far away. We also do baths during this time every other night or when needed. Both kids love baths!
• 6:45-7:00 Bedtime routine: Just like at the start of the day, it's a divide and conquer type of situation. Ewan and I have nursing session #7, change diaper, get in jammies, sing a song, turn on sound machine, and lay him down. He's usually out pretty quickly. Meanwhile, Michael and Isla read books while she gets in jammies, brush teeth, say prayers, say goodnight to everyone, get one last drink of water, and then sing "La La Loo" and "Baby Mine". She talks herself to sleep, sometimes up to an hour. 
• 7:00-? Adult time: Some days we wish we had more time with our kids and some days, we close those bedroom doors and take the biggest breath we've had all day. Michael and I finish picking up and doing odd jobs then we relax. I take a bath most nights and Michael heads downstairs to play video games or watch something. If it's Tuesday, we watch the Bachelor together in bed :) We always end the night watching something together and we *try* to talk if we need to. But some days, we turn the lights off and say "see you tomorrow" :) 

          On this particular day, I had a mom's night over zoom. Two of my mama friends are having babies               really soon, so we all wanted to catch up before we can't for awhile :) 

• 10:00-6:00 Sleep... sometimes :) Ewan is up every 2-4 hours most nights. Sometimes we can put the pacifier in and he puts himself back down. Other times he needs to be nursed to go back to sleep. I try to limit him to feeding around 11:00 and 2:00, but when he hits that 4:00 window it's a toss up of what kind of morning we'll have. I would love a stretch of like 6 hours, but we aren't there yet. Hopefully someday soon!

And that's our day! If Isla has taught me anything in the last two years, it's that as soon as you get used to something it'll change again. Sometime around seven months, babies usually transition to two naps. So I know this schedule will change and adjust as we go. That's why I prefer a rhythm, rather than a set schedule. But I feel a structured day gives all of us a better understanding and expectation of one another. I'm glad I get to be home to be a part of this time in their lives.